50th and Barnes. Penn. MacArthur. 23rd and Drexel. 36th and May. I used to know these streets. I used to drive them and walk them daily. In fact, it was rare for me to be anywhere but them. They used to be home.
The first year of college I would go there and it was still home. I would travel those streets like I was just there yesterday. The storefronts were familiar, the phone rang off the hook with people wanting to hang out. Everything there was home then. Things began to change, gradually. "Home" got more fuzzy. I couldn't remember the streets as well, people didn't call as much, no one knew if I came home, something, at some point, changed.
Now home is Forrester, Martin Luther King Drive, Lakeshore. I am not an integral part of any community, but merely a nameless face in the crowd most days. Everything has changed. I don't go home to Oklahoma City anymore, I go visit family, and a couple friends. I still consider myself an Okie, because it is almost unbearable to consider myself a Texan, but in reality, my prime years have all come in Texas. I graduated college, will soon, God willing, graduate seminary, I was married here. I preached my first sermon, and ate at P.F. Changs for the first time here. My wife is a Texan, so there is a certain affinity there, soon we will both be Colorado(-ans?). Things change, and that is a hard realization, but I feel very fortunate to have a few people in my life that, though they change and grow and mature, will be there.
I realize that instead of identifying myself by Barnes, or Lakeshore, or Forrester, or Austin, I can identify myself with Robin, and Grant, and Abby and Ginnie and Roberta and Desiree and Tyler, Erin and Bethany, Chris and Casey. People are what matters and what is comfortable, what is lovely and worth living for. I am so blessed to have been the places I have been, but those places only matter because of the people there. Soon the places I know now will be the past, but I can pray and hope that the people I love will still be where I am and that will make it home.
11.06.2007
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2 comments:
This post brought tears to my eyes. I love being apart of your life and I know all of those others feel the same.
Chris, I didn't know you had an active blog until I saw the post about your church blog. I know you wrote this over two years ago, but this gave me tears. Now that we're physically further away from each other than ever, I still feel deeply close to you in my heart and I love you very much. I'm blessed to have you as my brother.
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